Monday, November 8, 2010

The Bitter And The Sweet

I really love Thanksgiving even though it is a day that has a lot of sweet and a lot of bitter to it.

Past Thanksgivings have varied, most recently though we have able to spend the day with my mom. Other years we have visited my family in California, which is always a busy, harried, stressful event. My father's side of the family is Italian and every gathering is all things Italian, especially holidays. Very loud, lots of wine and cigars, football and fantastic food. I love how my Nana manages the whole affair, clad in one of her aprons. I have that visual in my head and I like it!

My mom's side (grandma and grandpa's house) is a quieter affair with all the turkey and trimmings set on a table that has been beautifully decorated. All the traditional fare is available and made with careful precision and planning. In addition, it is the best Thanksgiving one could ever hope to eat. The day is very peaceful and one can smell the aroma of stuffing and cooling pies before you even reach the front door! My grandma is a fabulous cook and I enjoy every bite she creates!

These days, I do a lot of the cooking. Mom and I share the duties but we try to keep it small since it is just 6 of us gathering. We cook everything from scratch and enjoy using as much local foods as we can. We relax in the quiet of the day, eat early, nap with cozy quilts, watch holiday movies and yes, even endure football (just for Ray.) We get to experience beautiful countryside and holiday weather.

On Thanksgiving 1993 Ray proposed to me and presented me with his grandmother's wedding ring. Unfortunately I was quite ill with Mono at the time but I perked up when he flashed that ring at me! We had only been dating for 2 months but we both knew we wanted to marry one another. We were engaged for a year before marrying.

Fast forward to Thanksgiving 2007 when I miscarried our child. So many women have similar experiences so I know I'm not alone in the grief of such a loss. One minute I was fine, the next I was heading to the ER. I have always believed our child was a girl so I wanted to name her Charlotte Josephine and call her Josie. I'm not sure if Ray was fully convinced on the name yet (or the gender for that matter, but I was set in my mind :)

Lots of joy and lots of sadness are wrapped up in that day A time to be happy and a time to mourn. A day that will always mean more in my heart than turkey and trimmings.

The day will always hold extreme significance in my life but I am choosing to embrace the fact that I am not alone in the journey. I am encouraged that God walks before me and leads my path through the joy and the pain of this thing called life. There is still beauty in it.


  1. Thank you Christy! I know you have been on quite a long journey - blessings to you and your little one :)


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