Dog Park Anonymity

Remember the theme song from the TV show, 'Cheers?' "You wanna go where everybody knows your name..." I totally just dated myself. At any rate, the dog park is not a place where you want everyone to know your name. Basically, when you have 3 shameless, misbehaving dogs the last thing you want is for people to have the ability to identify you. So, if I am being honest (and when aren't I on this thing?) the dog park has become my social outlet/support group for parents of ill mannered canines. We only know one another by our DOG'S name. We gather around on the benches while the dogs hump, bark, poop, pee, dig and sniff other canine bottoms and share horror stories of what our dogs have destroyed since the last time we spoke. Case in point, one lab climbed up to a top cabinet and proceeded to seek out and destroy 4 boxes of Girl Scout Samoa cookies. However they thought the other dog had done the evil deed and therefore pumped the wrong dog's stomach. Furthermore the woman was pregnant and Samoas were her one craving. Bad day to be a dog in that house. Often, if there are people I haven't seen before and my dog(s) steal their dog's toys, I deny they are my dogs and wait for them to leave before I leash mine up. There have been times I put my leash on dogs I thought were mine. Hey, there are a lot of yellow labs in the world. I draw the line at picking up other dog's potty than my own. Kinda like when you would change diapers. Changing your own child's? No problem. Some other kid? No freakin way. Sometimes I bring coffee to the park with me. Did you know that dogs like coffee? I will hunt their owner down if I see their dog scamming on my coffee. I drink it anyway - how gross is that? I liken it to checking your babies. "Hmmm..is this chocolate or something else - let me taste it and see." All bets are off when you are a parent to both kids and/or canines.