Marching Orders

Tonight I received my marching orders.

From my 12 year old daughter.

Tomorrow is her fine arts showcase night at school, as parents we will visit her art exhibit on display and   attend a presentation put on by her Spanish class.

We had just finished dinner when my daughter announced  she had some instructions for me in preparation for tomorrow night.

Yeah, turns out I'm not fit to be seen in public.

I'm a little disappointed in my Feminist daughter who expects me to fall into a role of a docile housewife.

For starters I'm not allowed to say anything to any student that speaks to my daughter.

I am allowed to smile but no words may be uttered.

I am not allowed to converse on a social level with any of her teachers, especially her Spanish teacher who "has it out for me."

We are to follow her lead once we arrive at school.

We will walk BEHIND her.

We will only speak when directly spoken to.

We will pretend we don't know her.

I decided I could use her terrorist like demands to my advantage

"What will you give me in exchange for my good behavior?"

She thought for a moment and then announced she would buy me weekly Starbucks from her leftover gift money.

She knows right where to get me.

Deal closed.

Right after she starts paying rent for her housing, buys all her own food, pays for her clothes and pays her own way through college....