Last night Adele visited me in a dream. I'm not sure if I should feel honored or scared.
"Hello, it's me. I was wondering when you were due to have your baby."
I calmly told her I wasn't pregnant.
She was mortified.
I laughed at her.
Immediately after waking this morning I promptly renewed my gym membership and I would like to send her the bill.
I pulled on yoga pants with the intention of doing yoga. We'll see in an hour because that's when my class starts.
I then went out to the grocery and bought gross things like millet and spinach.
I'm sad to say it took dreaming about Adele to propel me to do something.
Since my surgery I've gained some serious poundage. How couldn't I? I mean here I was recovering on the couch with Netflix and ice cream and pain meds. Uh, no brainer.
I always told myself when I got to the point where it was difficult to put my socks on, I knew I had to make adjustments.
Last week it hurt to put my socks on.
I'm a type of exerciser that will hit it hard for a couple years straight, then I stop whether it's due to work, school or schedules. All the weight I lost and strength I built goes down the toilet.
Say hello to carb induced highs and cravings.
One thing I have learned in recent years though is I'm not in a competition. There are ALWAYS going to be the svelte ladies. There are ALWAYS going to be women stronger than myself. There are ALWAYS going to be the proud moms that can flex muscles in gym selfies and look fantastic.
While I know (and am convicted) that my physical health needs attention I also know our emotional health as women is equally important. If exercise helps, great. If it doesn't, great. Do something for yourself that does. We need to look at our lives from a holistic approach. If something doesn't feel right, change the narrative. Be kind to yourself
I need to remind myself about acceptance when I buy a bigger pair of jeans. That taking a walk versus running 5 miles still counts. That smaller portions versus the Daniel Diet is OK. Our bodies experience perpetual change. A few months down the line you may need to buy a smaller pair of jeans. Cool. You may need to buy a bigger pair. Cool.
The main point to it all is do you feel good? Do you feel healthy? Do you feel strong?
That's what matters. Not only am I writing this to you, I'm writing it to myself because I need that constant reminder.
Right now though I'm a little ticked at Adele for her rude intrusion into my sleep.